And then they act up. Children get out of line, forcing one of you to delicately toe the line between straightening them out and offending a spouse, widening the ever-growing chasm between the two of you. They’ve become the marriage’s focus, moving your relationship as a couple onto the back burner.

Obstacles to closeness

Being a wife to a man with children from a previous relationship is a complex, challenging role that requires thick skin, patience, tolerance, and flexibility. The children are the backdrop to your marriage. When your husband fails to acknowledge, appreciate, support, and participate in your efforts to integrate the family, you end up feeling irrelevant, frustrated, and drained. Here are some things that distance you from your husband:

• Fear of being vulnerable and getting hurt by your husband
• Lack of time and privacy to devote to your relationship
• Fragile trust
• Lack of mutual compassion
• Poor conflict resolution skills

Solution: Collaborative efforts

The path to a happier, more intimate marriage is paved with understanding. Only open, honest, transparent communication will get you there. Deepening emotional intimacy means having the courage to engage in difficult conversations: constructive, effective conversations that lead to mutually satisfying conflict resolution.

Additionally, the following activities will help you restore and secure closeness with your husband:

• Bring romance back to your marriage by scheduling uninterrupted couple time in and out of your home.
• Schedule 15-45 minute conversations on topics such as: vulnerability, fear of being hurt, being heard, feeling alone, needing support, conflict resolution procedures.
• Develop at least one fun activity for just the two of you.
• Devise a parenting plan with clear guidelines for the two of you to follow.
• Be compassionate in understanding each other’s challenges.
• Create a vision for your marriage.

Closing thoughts

Building loving relationships is complex and hard. You need honest communication, trust, courage, and compassion—all things made especially difficult in the wake of failed marriages’ past hurt. Understand, act, survive, and thrive.

Remarriage can be the best time of your life, but do you wonder whether the bliss can last with intrusive exes and acting out stepchildren?

Discover how you can be remarried…and happy too!

Learn how to:

• Bring back the romance to your marriage
• Co-parent effectively with your ex, your husband’s ex, and your husband
• Create cherished memories and traditions
• Set obtainable goals
• Care for yourself amidst chaos
• Create a winning vision for your family

When

Thursday, 7:00-8:30p.m., April 12, 19, 26, May 3 2012

Where

4050 Katella Ave. #211
Los Alamitos, CA. 90720

Cost

$120 due by April 2, 2012

Reserve your seat today! Seating is limited.

How to sign up:

Call: 714.527.8111 or email yaffa@remarriedwithchildren.org.

Remember… You are not alone!

The Remarriage Showcase is far beyond just another bridal show. Not only does it help brides and grooms plan weddings, but it provides them with a recipe for successful marriages and families. I feel privileged to have had the opportunity to interview Paula Bisacre, because she’s creative and inspiring in her quest to help remarried couples succeed in their life journey.

What is the remarried bride showcase about?

Paula: The Remarriage Showcase for Encore Brides, the premier event for the remarrying bride is the first event tailored to meet the unique wedding planning and lifestyle needs of nearly one million remarrying brides and stepmoms-to-be who get married annually in the US.

How is it different than any bridal show?

Paula: By merging education, resources, expert advice, support, and entertainment into the Remarriage Showcase, we are reinventing the way engaged couples prepare for their encore wedding event, remarried life, and stepfamily living. It is a unique, elegant experience that helps people prepare for not only their wedding day, but for remarried and stepfamily life.

What do you hope to accomplish?

Paula: The divorce rate for second marriages is between 60-70%, depending upon which study you read. This rate is even higher than the divorce rate for first marriages. My goal is to help remarrying couples and stepfamilies-to-be prepared for their second wedding and remarried life. Remarrying couples and stepfamilies have unique needs. And, sometimes they don’t realize how unique their needs are until after their wedding day!

What is your vision for the remarried bride showcase?

Paula: Nearly one-third of the US population is remarried, or considering remarriage. My vision is to take the Remarriage Showcase for Encore Brides around the nation – and even world – to help remarriages succeed. Stepfamilies face many unique challenges. And, you can help enable success by anticipating what challenges you may face, and becoming aware of helpful resources, products, and services.

What inspired your vision of the Remarried bride showcase?

Paula: My own personal situation inspired me. When I got engaged to remarry, I got all of the bridal magazines and went to a bridal show. I learned they did very little for someone in my shoes; i.e., over 35 years old with children. And, after I got remarried, I found even fewer resources to help me with challenges that stepmothers and stepfamilies face.

I often say, “You know the word ‘change?’ Not as in ‘changing’ what you are going to wear or seating arrangements, but as in dramatically changing the lives of seven people, aged 6 to 44, all at once in one house? No wedding planner, etiquette book, or well-meaning philosophical conversation with my fiance’, let alone a bridal magazine or show, had prepared me for that.”

Who is it for?

Paula: The Remarriage Showcase for Encore Brides is for:

• Brides who are engaged to get remarried or rather get married again after divorce or widowhood, the “encore bride” in other words.
• Brides who have never been married and are preparing for their first marriage to someone who may or may not have been married before and has children; i.e., stepmoms-to-be
  Anyone starting life as a stepfamily or blended family.
• Grooms are most welcome! There are many resources available to help grooms and the couples together.
• Friends, family! Basically, anyone who wants to learn about the unique needs of remarrying couples and stepfamilies. It is helpful when friends and extended family understand how to best support a new stepfamily.

Do some women give you any feedback about attending the showcase as to how it impacted their wedding experience?

Paula: Yes! And, there have been some immediate positive results. One woman wrote to tell me that she won a book about step-parenting at our Remarriage Showcase and that she used the book and information she learned from the Showcase the very next day!

Another remarrying bride was accompanied by her aunt, who had been happily married already, and she took advantage of and loved the financial-related seminars.

What about the children? Co-parenting?

Paula: Sixty-five percent of remarrying couples have children. Nearly 30 million children under the age of 13 are living in a stepfamily. Another top reason for a remarriage to divorce is issues related to the children. This area is huge and requires much discussion between a remarrying couple with children before, during, and after the second wedding! My #1 piece of advice is to talk, talk, talk with your spouse-to-be! Communication is key. And, I’d be happy to share more at an upcoming Remarriage Showcase for Encore Brides! I hope to see you there!

Who do they include in the wedding party, and who do they invite, or avoid inviting?

Paula: This can get very complicated depending upon their personal situation. Generally speaking, I like to encourage remarrying couples to focus on what makes them happy. If the bride doesn’t want to wear white, she doesn’t have to. In fact, I know a woman who got remarried in Vegas in her golden years and she chose to wear black. She felt that it made her look her best, and she was stunning!

There is one thing I feel rather strongly about. If the bride and/or groom have children, they should include them in the wedding somehow. I know a guy who remarried and he didn’t invite his school-age children to his wedding; I don’t necessarily agree with that.

Come to our Remarriage Showcases and meet our encore bridal expert, Martha Wiles. She can help with all of the etiquette and planning questions.

Do they talk about pre-nuptials agreements?

Paula: Yes! They often do. And, we have sponsors that can help with this.

What about money management, estate planning, and budgets?

Paula: Yes! I strongly recommend it. Like with first-time marriages, financially-related challenges is a top reason for second marriages to divorce.

Do they mention a need to learn about how to make this web of relationships succeed?

Paula: Yes, although maybe not often enough. When you get engaged, it is easy to get caught up in the romance and the excitement. Dating a guy and being around his kids for dinner or even vacationing with them is one thing. Living day in and day out with them is another. There are many issues that can come up in a stepfamily. Yaffa, I know YOU are expert at helping to solve such problems that range from holidays, schedules, dealing with exes and extended family, etc. The list goes on and on, right?

Do they have doubts about their chances to be happy in the remarriage?

Paula: Yes, I think some have doubts. And, those who didn’t have doubts up until or on the wedding day can have doubts after the wedding. It is a remarriage journey. New challenges occur with time. Depending upon which study you read, it can take seven to twelve years for a stepfamily to “successfully blend.” Of course, we can write a book about that! I have written a book, Journal for Stepmoms to help stepmoms on their journeys, which can be challenging, frustrating, and stressful. And, other times it’s full of cherished memories, growth, and love.

Where have you hosted the Remarriage Showcase so far?

Paula: We’ve had the Remarriage Showcase for Encore Brides in Baltimore and in northern VA/Washington DC. Our next Remarriage Showcase will be held in Leesburg, VA on March 10, 2012. Then we will have two Remarriage Showcases:

• Morgan Run Club in Rancho Santa Fe, CA on October 13
• Coto de Caza Golf & Racquet Club in Coto de Caza, CA on October 14

Who are your sponsors?

Paula: We have sponsors from wedding-related businesses, such as bridal wear, cake design, florists, musicians, dj’s, photographers, jewelers, etc. And, we also have sponsors to help remarrying couples even after their wedding day, such as estate planners, realtors, family law attorneys, mediators, licensed counselors, coaches, financial advisors, etc. In addition, we have experts in travel, health, beauty, family-related services and events, interior design, etc. We’ve even had mortgage experts and builders are interested. Plus, a fashion show with encore bridal attire!

I truly care about who our sponsors are. We seek sponsors who understand and know how to serve remarrying couples’ needs. For example, our brunch sponsor for our upcoming Remarriage Showcase in Leesburg, VA, the owner of Clark & Associates, Inc. really “gets it.” Not only did Rick get selected as one of the 2011 Top Five Advisors of the Year by Senior Market Advisor Magazine, but he, himself has been remarried. Not every sponsor has been remarried, but my team personally ensures that we are aligned with the best sponsors who know how to serve the unique needs of the remarrying bride and groom.

Where will the showcase be next?

Paula: We are having two “meet & greets” on Janary 28-29 at our CA venues, pre-events to talk about remarriage and to meet businesses who may be a great fit for the Remarriage Showcase.

And, River Creek Club in Leesburg, VA on March 10.

Understand the obstacles to co-parenting, their effects, and how to overcome them by collaborative planning, to keep your new marriage from ending the same way as your last one.

Obstacles to co-parenting

Co-parenting has a few primary obstacles: difficult exes, threatened spouses, manipulative children, parental guilt, and lack of open communication.

Difficult exes have trouble separating their emotions from their interaction with you or your new spouse. Consider having a trained therapist or professional divorce mediator help mediate between the households. If the ex is totally hostile, utterly deaf to reason, and completely uncooperative, inter-household parenting may be impossible. In such cases, you and your spouse have no recourse but to develop a parenting plan independent of your exes.

New spouses feel threatened, at times, by interaction between you your ex or by your ex’s influence on your new marriage. By having your new spouse take an active hand in your parenting plan, they will feel and see that their input matters.The more the mutual parenting plan is out in the open, the less they’ll feel like secrets are being kept from them, and the better idea they’ll have of the boundaries of the influence your ex can exert over their new home.

Manipulative children have an easier time when their parents don’t communicate clearly. While they often exploit the guilt parents have over dissolving their old home, they will have a tougher time lying to parents outside of the know, and won’t be able to easily exploit inconsistencies between the households. This goes double for cases where cooperative co-parenting via a good parenting plan reduces the amount of disciplinary differences between households.

Poor communication leads to less empathy and understanding. It can encumber coordination. It occasionally prevents children from receiving support they need in the wake of events they have mentioned to one parent, but not the other. It also allows children to use one household as a sanctuary from disciplinary consequences of the other.

Taking a structured approach to inter-household parenting will help you avoid these pitfalls.

Solution: A Parenting Plan

Treat the development of your parenting plan like a business project. Separate feelings from practical considerations, and focus on your children’s best interest. Your parenting plan should ideally be the product of you, your spouse, and your child’s other biological parent. If your ex refuses to cooperate, you can independently construct one with your spouse.

Developing the Parenting Plan

Figure out the following:

• when and how long you want to spend time with the kids
• the values and beliefs you want to teach your children
• disciplinary methods (rewards and consequences) you believe are right for your children

Collect all of that in a list and sort it by priority, as you will likely have to make some sacrifices. Sorting it by priority lets you track which sacrifices are most acceptable.

Bring your calendar with you, and be prepared to hash out the following:

• scheduling who gets the kids during which events (e.g. birthdays, holidays, vacation)
• determining who is responsible for transportation for extracurricular activities, doctors appointments, etc.
• keeping track of dates for school, activities, etc.

If enough of you are tech savvy, using something like Google Calendar or Outlook will simplify things and save you lots of work.

Schedule a meeting with your spouse. When you are done with your individual preparations, compare your list. Agree to be cordial. If either of you get to upset, take a 15-minute break or reschedule. Stand firm on critical issues, but expect to compromise on smaller things. Biological parents generally have the last word in how their children are raised. The ultimate product of your meeting should be a list that organizes the things most important to you and your spouse.

You are now ready to meet with your ex and his/her spouse, assuming that they have completed the same prep work. Agree on a comfortable meeting place. If you or your former spouses are not comfortable meeting their “replacements,” don’t let it obstruct co-parenting: meet alone. You already have your spouse’s input.

Bring the calendar and the list. Present each other with your ideal parenting plans by discussing each item separately. Meetings of 60-90 minutes are more productive than longer ones. It may take more than one meeting to resolve. Write down the items you agree on and those that require further negotiation. Type a summary and mail it to the other parent (or spouse, if they weren’t present) to maintain transparency.

Conclusion

Co-parenting is fraught with obstacles. Inter-household involvement in parenting is ideal, but the world doesn’t end without it. A good co-parenting plan involves a lot of planning, but it pays off by:

• keeping ex-spouses involved in their children’s lives in a positive way
• reducing spousal insecurity by increasing transparency of interaction with exes
• setting a good role model for your kids
• making scheduling easier and eliminating unpleasant surprise demands
• cutting down on kids’ manipulation by making it harder to pit parents against one another, and by having other adults involved in a way that curbs parental overcompensation resulting from guilt

Evaluate what’s in your power to change. Assume responsibility and stay accountable without playing the blame game. Don’t let scheduling or ideological conflicts surprise you.

You can find organizational inspiration in these parenting plan worksheets and see a list of common issues in this list of questions from another parenting plan worksheet.

It’s a big pill, but stick to as much of this as you can and you’ll be golden.

The bitter pill is that Mother’s Day is primarily about mothers. If both the bio and step moms in your family can share the day, then bravo: there’s no need to read the rest of this. For the rest of us, here’s a guide to being sensitive and understanding during a surprisingly tense holiday for stepfamilies.

Bio-moms

This is your day. This is your day to be acknowledged for your role. This is your day to celebrate the relationship between you and your children.

You didn’t count on your children having a stepmom. You’re threatened by her kindness, her nurturing attitude, and your children’s feelings for her. Come to terms with her existence by understanding she’s not in competition with you. Parents are irreplaceable; you’re your children’s only biological mother. Regardless of their connection with her, they need their bond with you. She serves a different role.

One of the greatest gifts you can give your children is permission to like, and even love, their stepmother. They will love, appreciate, and respect you for giving them freedom of choice.

Stepmothers

Stepmothers feel unappreciated. Your husband, your stepchildren, and their biological mother take you for granted. They fail to appreciate all of the work that goes into accommodating their schedules, dropping them off, picking them up, and filling their bellies.

Mother’s day isn’t the time to fix it. Set aside a day—perhaps Sep. 16th, Stepfamily Day—where they can celebrate your place in their hearts.

Your stepchildren need to see you honor their relationship with their mother. Let their mother have her day with them, and don’t take it personally that Mother’s day isn’t your day. The children are confused enough by Hallmark and the media telling them what their perfect family day is supposed to look like, as it is.

Children

Children feel anxious trying to decide how to behave on Mother’s Day. They know their mother is expecting to feel like she is the one and only mother figure. If they like and love their stepmother, they want to acknowledge her too. They don’t want to hurt bio-mom’s feelings, so they ‘freeze,’ trying to figure out how to cause the least damage for themselves and the two mother figures in their lives.

Parents need to provide a warm and safe emotional environment for the children so they can express their thoughts and feelings, trusting that they are heard and that they matter. Consider the children’s wishes when deciding how to celebrate Mother’s Day.

Dads

Remarried dads walk a tight rope as Mother’s Day approaches. On one hand, they know they need to allow the day to be bio-mom’s day. On the other, they are aware of their wife’s distress and need to acknowledge her importance in the family. They feel that no matter what they are going to say or do, they will be responsible for someone’s disappointment.

Discussing the day in advance with their wife is very helpful. Set aside time to discuss the matter. Hear each other’s thoughts and feelings. Acknowledging your differences, and reaching compromise will make the day a source of celebration, instead of frustration.

Conclusion

In an ideal world, mothers and stepmothers would both be honored, pampered and loved on Mother’s Day, each equally accepting of and grateful for each other’s contribution to the children’s well being. This world is far from perfect. Be realistic, stop stepping on each other’s toes, and remember the children are best served by having biological and step parents treat each other congenially.

Biological mothers feel threatened by a potential mother figure entering their children lives. Memories of the good, the bad, and the ugly from their marriage to this man get reactivated. Anger, resentment and sadness overwhelm them and they resort to attack mode on the new wife.

“How I Left Your Mother”

Violated expectations breed strife. Everyone has ideas about how things should be, and dreams about how they will. And then, well, things aren’t. The new wife, the old father, and the young children all have their own expectations; the thread that threatens to unravel your marriage is how everyone winds up wrong.

These are the most volatile expectations that get violated:

Father’s expectations

• there will be an instantaneous love/getting-along between his wife and his children
• that his new wife can immediately serve as a new mother
• the children will welcome her with open arms
• his ex wife will be out of the picture

Stepmom’s expectations

• her husband will always be supportive
• her husband will always take her side
• the kids will respect and listen to her
• she’ll become good friends with the ex-wife
• step-kids will be welcoming or, at worst, indifferent, but not hostile

Bio-Mom’s expectations

• she’ll be her children’s only mom
• her mothering won’t be interfered with by her children’s new stepmother
• her children will be loyal to her
• she deserves to know everything about her children’s other household

Children’s expectations

• the relationship with their parents won’t change
• their new stepmom won’t discipline them
• their routine won’t change
• everything is about them

Damage Control for Stepmoms

How’s a stepmom to ensure her marriage endures the fallout? There are different measures you can take with your husband, your stepkids, and your stepkids’ mother.

Operate with your husband as a couple, not two people.

• Schedule topic-driven discussions. Make time for addressing specific issues. Don’t sidetrack. Attack one problem at a time until you reach a joint decision. E.g., if you feel unsupported or that you need help in dealing with your children’s biological mother, bring it up during one of these discussions. These discussions don’t have to be done daily, but rather as things come up. 15-45 minutes is a good block of time to dedicate. (More info at Tips for Conflict Resolution.)
• Nurture your relationship. Your husband has this responsibility too; make sure he knows it. The two of you should schedule time together as a couple, during which you don’t worry about your children, household, or anything but one another. Ideally, try for about:
  • 15 minutes of daily couple time.
  • a weekly date night (2-5 hours alone).
  • a weekend away, as a couple, every 3 months.
  • A note for these tough, economic times: Instead of hiring babysitters, if you’re friends with another couple with children, you can set up a sort of exchange program. Members of extended family (especially grandparents) can be a great help too!

Spare the Rod

• Don’t discipline your stepkids during your marriage’s first 18 months. Let their father do it.
• Instead, focus on developing bonds with your stepchildren.
• Acknowledge the relationship they have with their mother. You can tell them things like, “I’m happy that you have a good relationship with your mother. I’m not out to replace her. Your mother has a special place in your heart, and I accept that.”
• Acknowledge their bio mom’s rules. Your husband’s rules take precedence in your household, but don’t disparage the children’s mother for rules you find frivolous. If there’s a rule conflict between the two households, let your husband deal with his ex.
• Help your husband maintain the children’s routine as best possible. Children don’t like change; they like stability.
• Establish clear boundaries with your stepchildren. Even though you’re not yet responsible for disciplining your stepchildren, it’s fine to make clear that, for example, your stepdaughters aren’t to go into your room and use your clothes and make-up as though it were theirs.

Tame the Wicked Witch of the Other Household

Have a conversation. Meet in person, if possible, and if she’s not prone to sudden, violent outbursts. During it, make sure to address the following:

• Reassure her that you’re not out to replace her (as a mother, not a wife).
• Let her know that you’ll support her parenting decisions wherever possible.
• You’re not out to turn her children against her.
• Your husband will be the primary coordinator of information and planning between households. Unless she hates him. Just make sure she knows that you’re looking out for her children’s best interests.

Closing Thoughts

Curbing bad expectations keeps a lot of needless stress and conflict out of your life. Your relationship will be healthier, your marriage will be healthier, and everyone involved will be able to bench press the emotional equivalent of 300lbs without skipping a beat.

He has been a stepfather for 25 years to this 29 year old woman and her sister. When I think of successful and happy remarriages, I think of this wonderful couple which I have the privilege to have as friends.

I hope you enjoy reading it. I would love to hear your impression of it.

Have a very happy, healthy and prosperous new year.

Here’s the letter:

Triumphant Love

I was not concerned about
trying to find the right
words to say when giving you
this gift. I looked at what I put in this frame and the
first thing that came to
mind were the two words,
“Triumphant Love”. I can’t
help but cry because I
realize now how hard it was
to love us. Maybe me more than my sister, but you were
triumphant in succeeding
to create a bond out of
a wreck. It’s moments like
the one I framed that I
remember more than the
bad or hard times. I think
that is what my problem is
when I can’t recall things
I did or said.
Not only with me, but with
any battle you have faced,
you were triumphant, and
now facing a battle that
is truly life or death, I
pray that you triumphant again.
That these moments
keep happening and that
I have you in my corner
for a joke, a hug, or
a seat belt race.

I love you!
Merry Christmas!

December 14, 2010 @ 6:00-7:00PM PST
(Usually, the third Wednesday of every month.)

Number: 605.715.4900
Access code: 549 8622

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Explore your interests

Comment and tell us about what topics you’d like us to focus on, or if you just can’t wait and want to share early.

Unresolved grief, hostile exes, and your children’s fantasies collaborate to make this one of the most difficult times of the year for you, and here’s how.

The Ghost of Losses Past

Nostalgic holiday activities cause old grief to resurface. It may be grief over loss of an old marriage or of a support system like an ex’s extended family or once-mutual friends.

Problem

You may fear that the stormy emotions you are experiencing indicate that you miss your ex, that you still have feelings for your former spouse, or that maybe you remarried prematurely. You panic, withdraw from your spouse, and become overly accommodating of your ex. Your spouse now feels slighted.

Solution

• Acknowledge and recognize your feelings, whether they are positive, negative, or both.
• Understand that memories and feelings resurface on anniversaries of events and special occasions such as holidays. It does not necessarily indicate that you want to be back with your ex; it’s just your brain healing from past traumas.
• Write a goodbye letter to your ex. but do not send it. It is an excellent tool for letting go and getting closure on the old feelings and the relationship. It liberates you from the past and helps you heal.

The Ghost of Marriage Past

Anger, hostility, and rigidity often linger after divorce. The more conflicted the marriage and the divorce, the greater the residual enmity. Even if you’ve already let go, your ex may not have.

Problem

Organizing even minor custody changes is tense and unfruitful. The holidays are hectic and plans get interrupted by unexpected circumstances. Those interruptions give your ex an opportunity to resist rescheduling and spite you.

Solution

• E-mail is a great communication tool because it allows for an opportunity to process the information and plan the response.
• Validate your ex’s frustration with you changing schedules, and make your point succinctly without making it personal.
• Transparency. Run things by your present spouse first, when collaborating with your ex. It will deepen your trust and intimacy.

The Ghost of Rituals Past

Your children plea with you to celebrate the holidays like in the old times. They want both biological parents and their extended families, in addition to your new spouse and his/her family. They miss the old rituals and want to continue being one big, happy family.

Problem

The children still grieve the loss of their biological family. Continuing to celebrate together sends the children mixed messages about the relationship between you and their other parent. It awakens fantasies of their biological parents reuniting. Your present spouse will feel uncomfortable if you suggest to celebrate with your ex for the children’s sake.

Solution

• Develop new holiday traditions after your remarriage.
• Maintain some old traditions for the sake of familiarity, comfort, and continuity.
• Listen to your children attentively. Remind them that you love them and that as a responsible parent, you make the decisions based on their best interests, even if sometimes it doesn’t feel that way.

Closing thoughts

Clear boundaries are essential in any relationship. People feel safer when they know what to expect and that their needs are respected. In divorced families, in particular, boundaries between households help children adjust during transitions.

The holidays present a great opportunity for parents and children to deepen their connections through planning fun, meaningful activities. For stepfamilies, it’s also a way to develop new traditions and strengthen bonds between stepchildren and step parents.

For more advice, check out 5 Ways to Ruin Stepfamily Holidays and read Your Stepfamily Holiday Survival Guide.

• Getting anxious over the upcoming holidays?
• Is the tension rising between you, your spouse, and your ex over visitation schedules?
• Looking for support and guidance for joyous celebrations?

Join us in exploring & learning how to create harmony for you and your family during the hectic holiday season. You will find out how to:

• Create a vision of your desired holiday experience, and implement it.
• Develop new traditions.
• Set realistic expectation of the family.
• Plan the budget.
• Schedule private couple time
• Take care of yourself.
• Communicate effectively thoughts and feelings.
• Accommodate interfaith differences.
• Ease the pain of transitions in children’s absence due to visitations.

December 2, 2010 @ 6:30-8:00PM
(First Thursday of every month, at the same time.)

Where:
4050 Katella Ave. #211,
Los Alamitos, CA 90720
(click for directions)

RSVP to Attend

Explore your interests

Comment and tell us about what topics you’d like us to focus on, or if you just can’t wait and want to share early.